Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
