i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
