ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize