I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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