So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
