At least make sure they are 18
Why
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize