My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
