We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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