I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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