he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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