today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
