Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
