"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
