hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
