Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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