I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
BRING THE BAGELS
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
