Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
