K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
