glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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