I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Randomize
