She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
