the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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