After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
