At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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