there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize