i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
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