We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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