You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
