he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i came on her dog
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
So I just went to clothing optional bar
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
