Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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