im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Randomize
