Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize