Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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