Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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