I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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