The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
