i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Another day, another engagement, another cat
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize