The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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