Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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