I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
where does the pee come out of this thing
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
