Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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