I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Randomize