You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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