how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
and she was petting her beer can
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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