im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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