all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
i think im in europe. pls send help
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