question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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