i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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