I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
