I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
